I Bet You Eat Your Young...

Yeah, finally another update. I'm home sick (yes, sick. Not skipping.) from school and so I figure I might as well do something a little bit productive. I'll just throw some randomness out there as that's really all my brain's capable of producing tonight.

The retreat was great, really difficult and probably the worst retreat I've been on personally, but it went really well for the candidates and I know it touched a lot of people. And that's the point. As I hopped off the bus, the first thing I heard was Becki saying 'Erin! We're putting you at a table, is that okay?' So I didn't have to do the rose skit and I was incredibly thankful that the Lord worked that out for me 'cause I never would have held up. Let's see... talks were absolutely amazing given that most had little or no practice. Michael and Claire, in my opinion, could easily go into careers involving public speaking or ministry, and it was so beautiful to hear Emily finally disclose a story that even the team had never heard. Other than that, hmm... I liked P&W for the most part, Mass was interesting in both positive and negative ways, and Saturday night was a very much-needed experience in many aspects. I learned a lot about myself, the past, future, and the like. It was great to be prayed over by Jags and Sanchez, as they both prayed over me at the 2 other monumental retreats in my life, and every time they reveal exactly what I need to know. As I got up, Sanchez said 'whoa, you cry a lot!' ...Isn't that the truth... silly me. Backi and Lou's chastity talk... great. For the first time I totally agreed with everything they had to say, because now I totally understand it, and I have an amazing respect for their courage. The food was good. Wow, that was a long string of uncorrelated thoughts. Oh well.

On December 11th there's a thing called Lessons and Carols at St. Bavo. It's basically a musical performance that the audience sporadically participates in. There are tons of Christmas songs interwoven with readings and reflections, so it's about an hour and a half long. Anyway, I'm really excited because I'm singing a verse solo on 'O Holy Night' and Will Heckaman and I are singing 'What Child Is This?' and 'Child of the Poor' as a duet. I really wish y'all could come, but obviously the timing is really bad so I suppose if you pray for me that'll be just as great.

Wow, my writing is really not very articulate right now. Very choppy. Perhaps a bit of music will help. And no, this isn't about suicide, you silly people. Oye!

There's a postcard out my window
and it's moving at light speed
go from trailer parks to trashcans
from the highway to the trees
Now these roads have all been driven
and these words have all been made
what's that light that's coming toward me?
Why are the lines beginning to fade?

Beam me up Scotty
life's been grand
but on the other hand
I can hear Him singing my name
I'm ready to rise out
of all the haze
it's the end of my days
and I've lived them well

lawyer on the bed of his pride
still he's searching for loopholes
hoping maybe he'll be counted
as a silver made of gold
Nevermind these stubborn lies
you only have one track to record
so choose your words wisely
and be careful with your chords
so on the last day you'll be thinking

Beam me up Scotty
life's been grand
but on the other hand
I can hear Him singing my name
I'm ready to rise out
of all the haze
it's the end of my days
and I've lived them well

His hair is as white as winter
His eyes are loving flames
And so I spend each moment
I will win this race, this game

Beam me up Scotty
life's been grand
but on the other hand
I can hear Him singing my name
The skies are all on fire
and I'm awake
my soul is His to take
I'm just waiting now