Monday, October 17, 2005

Ohhh... connections!

Today, I awoke and had no idea how many little connections were awaiting my scrutiny. Bah, I shall attempt to go into detail here, but I know I'll forget some things...

Anyway, so I begin. Ahem.

Have you ever had a random string of words stuck in your head for no apparent reason, words that are seemingly uncorrelated until actually thought out? Yeah, that happens to me constantly, usually in my sleep. I have learned that usually the phrase has some significance and I should look into it further, otherwise it'll be stuck in my head like a broken record all day. So, I awake from a deep and dreamless sleep at about 2 in the afternoon. Yes, extremely late, even for me. I lay in bed for awhile with my eyes closed in something of a half-daze, half-slumber. Slowly, I begin repeating the phrase 'new paint rippington the 2nd' in my head. Over and over, without even realizing I'm doing it. Finally, about 15 minutes later, I recognize what wheels are turning about in my head and jump promptly onto Google for help. Usually, I Google the phrase that's in my head and click 'I'm Feeling Lucky,' finding some bit of insight or some fact I should be aware of. Today, however, that first link proves worthless, and I am somewhat baffled by the fact that my method might be merely coincidental. Of course, I know this is silly as it has worked so many times before and I honestly don't believe in coincidences. So I go back to the Google main page and stare at the screen wondering what to do. Finally, I come to an epiphany. I Google again, this time for the phrase 'new paint rippington.' I clicked on the 2nd link, and the first thing I read is the word 'Topaz.' Topaz is the birthstone that is considered the Gem of the Setting Sun. In literary terms, the setting sun symbolizes the end of something. The word right below 'topaz' is October, and the number right beside that is $13.98, rounded to 14. The second thing on the page that I notice is the statement in bold right beneath the word Topaz... 'A change for the better.'

Thus, the phrase 'new paint rippington' has led me to see that is important that I understand that October 14th was a change for the better.

Later, I go to the Youth Mass. As I walk into the Church about 5 minutes into the Mass, I feel like Christ is so far from me, like I am weak in faith for allowing myself to be broken. The Lord was strong amidst trial, yet I am not. I look around for a place to sit, and since I don't particularly enjoy sitting in pews with lots of people already in them, I slide into the end of the only empty pew in the back. Feeling weak and unworthy, I wonder how I could have possibly allowed myself to fall yet again, how I should have fixed my eyes upon Jesus the first time. Distracted by what seemed like movement behind me, I look up and realize that I am sitting within a foot of the 7th station: Jesus falls a 2nd time. I have fallen and been broken twice. I am not unworthy or isolated from Christ because of it, I am united and beautiful because of that suffering. Even Christ fell thrice. (And Christ suffered 7 mortal wounds, the hematidrosis in Gethsemane, the crown of thorns, the scourging, the 3 nails, and the piercing with the lance.) Suffering is sanctifying.

I love the Lord, He must have so much fun tinkering with my brain!


At October 17, 2005 12:47 AM, Blogger Andy said...

Connections like that are awesome. I'd always tell my parents about all of my meaningless connections when I was little like how when you multiply my 1st and 2nd favorite numbers you get my 3rd favorite. That's amazing that your connections led you to such insight. Though they usually seem to be just subconscious things you've unknowingly picked up I'm positive God played a part in this one since you're message was so profound.


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