Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Eager to Please

When the cradle falls
you'll have to take it all in stride
The stars about you lay
you feel too small to have your way
you didn't know cause you never tried
but the light is on the other side

three wishes, three ways
to find yourself in three little days
rip emotions away
they're gone like today

Pretty baby, poor baby
you just rock yourself to sleep
the shapes and shadows on the walls
are all the company you keep
and though you're in too deep
this dream is too sweet to wake from
but bend or break
tomorrow's gotta come

The alibi is gold
you take one look and then you're sold
so eager to please
so much more than you see
you're out of reach and incomplete
waiting for some missing piece

two dollars in change, two broken hearts
all that's left when time and space leave their mark
rip the pages away
there's nothing left to say

Pretty baby, poor baby
you just rock yourself to sleep
the shapes and shadows on the walls
are all the company you keep
and though you're in too deep
this dream is too sweet to wake from
but bend or break
tomorrow's gotta come

one life, one memory
of a sweet but saddened baby
rip the covers away
she's still okay

Pretty baby, poor baby
you just rock yourself to sleep
the shapes and shadows on the walls
are all the company you keep
and though you're in too deep
this dream is too sweet to wake from
but bend or break
tomorrow's gotta come

lullaby, and goodnight...
____________________________

Still not finished, but negative and positive feedback are always appreciated!

5 Comments:

At June 30, 2005 12:38 AM, Blogger Mike said...

I really like how it flows, but as i read it it came off like rap-rhyming in a few spots, which isn't necessarily bad, but i'm sure it isn't the effect you were going for.

leahciM

 
At July 01, 2005 12:43 AM, Blogger Phydeauxs99 said...

Good post. But why did you post it?

 
At July 01, 2005 12:58 AM, Blogger Erin said...

Why not?

 
At July 01, 2005 1:08 AM, Blogger Andy said...

I’ve gotta agree with Michael about the whole rap-rhyming thing, but if it sounds good when sung then more power to ya. I like your last one a little better because it was a little more upbeat & it sounded hopeful. This song however has a little more substance to it as though you didn't write it just to please your audience but you wrote it to fully express how you felt at the time. Anyway, all in all, I like it.

Oh yeah, & is the line "the shapes and shadows on the walls
are all the company you keep" supposed to have anything to do with schizophrenia?

 
At July 01, 2005 1:19 AM, Blogger Erin said...

haha actually, no, though I guess it could. It simply refers to the solitude of the room where the song is set, and how the sometimes the only company you should have are the shapes and shadows inside your own four walls.

 

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